I promissed to be a good doctor but........

When I was in Samangan, I was supposed to be oncall 24 hours………sometimes I lost my temper, and become very cruel to people……….the same was my colleague; Dr Hazim………. Quarrel with people happened several times, and every time just after the argument, we realized our mistake and become so upset that made us cruel to our own………… finally we found the courage to bring this mistake to each other…………. Since we were the leaders in the hospital and knew that our behavior will affect the behavior of our subordinates, we promised to find more tolerance and to have more control on our emotions…… but what happened next day made me break my promise. A young pregnant lady was brought to hospital with bleeding and prolonged labor, after workup we found that she was candidate for C-Secion…………consent was taken from husband and relatives were asked to arrange blood…….. since it was an emergency case Dr Hazim toke the OT while I got the responsibility to find blood for the patient………. The only person with the same blood was mother……but she refused to donate…..I was explaining that with donating blood she would not be harmed and she would save life her daughter…… but to my surprise both father and mother was pointing to their son in law that it should be him that would lose his wife and he need to find blood. Several times during this argument I lost my patience and become angry but soon I remembered my promise and acted to be calm………..finally I toke father to a private place and said “ is your wife having monthly periods? Is she losing blood in her periods?” he said “yes. Lots of blood……..” and I said “ so we are going to take the blood that she is losing monthly………” saying this he agreed and after a brief talk to her wife she also agreed……..and I asked a nurse to get prepared for blood transfusion…..a minute letter the nurse came back to me that they have changed their decision……..father came to me with a great anger “doctor you promised that you will use blood that my wife is losing monthly………but your nurse wants to take blood from her arm…………… if my daughter is going to die………I don’t want to lose my wife…………” I could not control myself and take from arm of the father and toke him out of hospital and warned him never to come back to the hospital to see her daughter………. Still when I remember the way I behaved, I feel sorry…….and I would be felling sorry as long as I remember.
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